Guest Blogger #4: Sarah Finks. She is always trying to find ways to provide her family with healthy meals and a warm welcoming home. Visit her blog Three Boys Home.
I had an interesting exchange on Facebook this morning with several other moms. The original post was a mom who needed to get her “groove back.” I instantly new what she was talking about and so did several others. If you are not familiar with this phenomenon I will try to explain. From about the time you get pregnant to I’d say AT-LEAST 6 months after the baby is born you are in a kind of baby fog (for lack of a better term).
I am sure hormones have something to do with this but during this time you lose interest in yourself as a person and are solely committed to growing, feeding, caring for this little creature with little thought of yourself. Before I had kids, I thought “that will never be me, I am a capable woman and can take wonderful care of my children without sacrificing myself in the process!” I would be sure to look my best before leaving the house, could engage in interesting adult banter over cocktails, and was, at least I think, pretty good company.
Now after 3 kids in 2.2 years I am lucky to have showered for the day and forget about looking my best! If I have clothes on I consider myself good to go. My interesting adult banter consists of play date scheduling, tips on keeping your kitchen floor clean, and how to get your kids to stop screaming in the car. Seriously I should not be allowed to have discussions with people who don’t have small children, I actually find myself confused and unable to follow the conversation!
As I have been going through this process I find myself trying to identify what it is in life that I truly enjoy doing. Eventually these boys who are SO dependent on me will become more and more independent. I am very lucky to have the opportunity to stay home with my 3 boys. In fact its the best experience of my life.
I think this unsettled feeling for me may have started way before I had children. I liked my career enough, it paid the bills. But it was never something that I looked forward to. There must be something out there for me that doesn’t feel like a JOB. Just an extension of me… right now that is being fulfilled by staying at home raising my children and making a home for my family.
But this will not go on forever and I think there is more to me that I don’t even know about. I very much feel that I rushed through high-school and college without much thought. It was about getting good grades, graduating, and getting a job. I also think that I was too immature at the time to put aside outside influences and focus on myself.
As the twins get older the fog is clearing slowly but surely. But I am sure the girl who thought she could climb Mt. Everest with a baby on her back is long gone. Hopefully to be replaced with a more mature and even more interesting version. I can’t wait to meet her! Hopefully sooner than later?
*Leave a comment below to help Sarah win the BIG guest blogger contest!