What is a Mommypotamus?
You see before you the starting point of Mommypotamus.com – a children’s book I love to read to our daughter. In the book, a socially hesitant potamus (for we all know by now how many varied forms of potami there truly are) sees everybody playing and doing cool stuff together, but she is always hanging back. I won’t spoil the ending for you. But it’s a real tearjerker.
With most of Katie’s stories I get bored and accidentally use the wrong voice for the wrong characters halfway through. But not so with this one. I so obviously enjoy it each time we read this book that Daniel started calling me Mommypotamus. It stuck, because in a lot of ways the book is about me.
I experienced loss early in my life. I don’t want sympathy (PLEASE!!!). I’m just saying that because I became a very timid, cautious person as a result. Being fearful took a huge toll on my health, as did my total ignorance of what healthy food really was (at the time I thought that meant Grape Nuts with half a cup of sugar poured over the top). By my early twenties my health was failing. I was rail-thin and could not gain weight, my abdomen hurt constantly, and I had severe-acid reflux and acne. I was told not to get pregnant because I was not capable of carrying a baby to term.
I was alive, but I wasn’t living. I was sick of being sick, or so I thought. After seeing doctors, quacks and I don’t-even-know-what-to-call-them, I came to a very strange conclusion:
I realized that being sick had a payoff for me. Being “sickly” got me attention. Being afraid to “get out there” and take chances didn’t. I wanted life to come to me without me having to take any risks. But in choosing to be a “hanger-backer” I had slowly evolved into “the girl in the plastic bubble.”
God knows what He is doing. He knew that if my body were healed it would do nothing for my sick soul. Don’t you think it’s strange that when Jesus met the lame man at the pool of Bethesda, he asked him if we wanted to be well? But really, how many of us define ourselves by our weaknesses (and actually enjoy it on some level)?
So at the perfect time I met a fabulous doctor (not an M.D., a PhD) who used a modified version of acupuncture (using lasers) to help me get well. The timing was perfect, as I said, because I was ready to be well. For the first year I lived in daily amazement when I woke up pain-free. I rushed headlong into life, sucking in every possible experience.
I used to be alive without living. Now I have said “yes” to life: All the good stuff with pain and disappointment mixed in. All of it. Now, when people pay attention to me (and they sometimes do!), I want it to be because I have something loving, funny, or helpful to say. I want to live my life so loudly that people can’t help but take notice. Not in the “spotlight-hog” kind of way, just in the plain ole “everybody is unique and we should celebrate it” way.
For those of you that have read the book, it is for this reason that with all my heart I cry:
Melanie Buck
I am printing this and putting it on the fridge. Beautiful, brave and inspirational.
Heather
Thank you, Melanie. I really can’t put into words what your response means to me.
Richard
Daniel told me a little bit about the history of the name, but failed to mention all of this. Defiantly a defining story. This is definitely one to bookmark for later use.
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Heather
That’s a good way to put it, Richard. There are a lot of defining stories in our lives. Most of the early ones are about what happens to us, but the later ones are about what happens within us. I like the later ones better.
Joanna Moore
we just read that the night before last. i LOVE sandra boynton books… i really should just go find and buy them all! riley and i like to use different foreign accents each time we read it, just to add to the fun. i never really thought that deeply into the theme that you’ve drawn out of it, so thanks for opening my eyes! “but YES!….” is julia’s favorite part and she always chimes in with excitement.
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Heather
I love her books, too. In fact, I’m not sure I don’t like them more than Katie does!
Des
Okay! totally going to be getting that book on Amazon. What an amazing post Heather. Great job!
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Heather
Thanks, Destiny. I am SO glad you’re back!
Kristine
Wow, that’s amazing! I’m SO glad your my sister-in-law.
CHERI DESSINGER
It has and continues to be a joy to get to know you, Heather. One would never know what you have been through. When I look at my own life, I wonder if this pain thing is an attention getter. It sure doesn’t feel like it. Have a great day, and give everyone a hug.
Heather
Cheri, I hope my post doesn’t imply that I believe everyone struggling with an illness has the same issues I did. This was definitely a personal journey for me. I’m continuing to pray for resolution to your back pain.
Daniel (Daddypotamus)
… but not the Daddydillo
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Erin Hessel
Thank you for sharing your journey! I don’t have experience with laser-acupuncture…but I see similar cases in my acupuncture/herbal clinic all the time. We always have the ability to choose our perception of whatever circumstance we are in, which I believe is a first step in true healing and true power. Also, the interconnectedness of our emotions and our health. Fear, anger, joy (yes-hyperactive joy), grief and worry are the five main contibutors to many discomforts according to Chinese medicine. Just as it is important to treat disease with the appropriate medicine, to heal we must consider our emotions and spirit as much as our physical bodies. Acupuncture certainly played an enormous part in my own path and I’m happy to hear it was for you as well. You go, mommypotamus!
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Heather
Erin, I’m so glad you brought up how interconnected our emotions and bodies are. A few months ago I sat sobbing in my chiropractor’s office, scared that I had lost our baby. The chiro is a close friend and he treated me for emotions using an acupressure technique (I think). It immediately calmed me and I was able to go forward with more clarity. It was an amazing experience.
Linda
What an amazing post! So inspirational! I look forward to reading your blog and getting to know more about you.
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